Greengeezer

[riflearm2]

‘Geezer, as an elder on this board, I’d like to start using you as my relationship adviser. Any guy who can nurture plants and flowers like you do is sure to have great advice on relationships, too.

I spent the last two nights in Tulsa with this gem. Knowing that 27 year old ‘tang still has a pretty long time before the expiration date, do I invite her to move to SoCal with me? Cut it off now because 27 year old drama is not worth the other benefits? Slow play it to see what her views on a second girl are?

It’s important for you to know that of all of the girls, the one I probably should have married was raised in Tulsa, so maybe I have a thing for Oklahoma girls.

I look forward to your advice, sir.

 

[herdfan06]

Does she have long fingers?

 

[greengeezer]

Remember when Dirty Harry said, “A man has to know his limitations.” I am very good at a select range of activities. Relationships are not one of them.

However, here is my take. You are 40 plus and to my knowledge, none of your relationships have been long term. I see no reason that this one will be any different. Maybe invite the beautiful young lady for a long weekend to see how it goes.

 

[HerdandHokies]

I’m sure everyone here has seen Puss in Boots 2. Greengeezer is the moral cricket on Jack Horner’s (riflearms) shoulder.

 

[greengeezer]

I’m sure everyone here has seen Puss in Boots 2. Greengeezer is the moral cricket on Jack Horner’s (riflearms) shoulder.

I was once referred to as a cockroach, but a cricket is a new one.

 

[HerdandHokies]

I was once referred to as a cockroach, but a cricket is a new one.

Imagine James Stewart mixed with Jiminy Cricket

 

[riflearm2]

Does she have long fingers?

I'm not sure, but she enjoyed mine more than hers.

You are 40 plus and to my knowledge, none of your relationships have been long term.

In middle school, I dated a girl for 8 months (I was 13, she was 15). In high school, I dated a girl for 1.5 years into the start of college. In college, I had two girlfriends (separate from each other this time) for 1 year each. When I was in my late 20s, I had a girlfriend for a year. In my early 30s, I had one for two years. In my mid 30s, I had one for about two years. In my early 40s, I had one for about 1.5 years.

Two years is a lot of bullshit to put up with. Not sure what more you can expect out of me.

Maybe invite the beautiful young lady for a long weekend to see how it goes.

That's your attempt at advice? "Maybe invite"? "See how it goes"? We know how it's going to go. After one night, I won't care if she's in my bed again. But are there other other things I should look for other than just bangability if I bring her to SoCal?

 

[HerdandHokies]

May want to hose her off and see what she looks like first

 

[muthed]

Remember when Dirty Harry said, “A man has to know his limitations.” I am very good at a select range of activities. Relationships are not one of them.

However, here is my take. You are 40 plus and to my knowledge, none of your relationships have been long term. I see no reason that this one will be any different. Maybe invite the beautiful young lady for a long weekend to see how it goes.

And he can take the kid to Disneyland. Oh wait...that was another chick. There's so many, I can't keep up.

 

[greengeezer]

Damn, I’m not Ann Landers. It seems your average span with a woman is about a year and a half. You might as well take a chance. How bad could it be? I put up with a kidney stone for a year. Drama can’t be nearly that bad.

 

[riflearm2]

May want to hose her off and see what she looks like first

That body and some fakies are enough for a couple of nights. She came to the hotel at 10:30 pm last night with no makeup, so she passed the test. From the first night, the mascara was the only heavy thing. She does the line off of the side of the eye for that punk rock/cat look.

And he can take the kid to Disneyland. Oh wait...that was another chick. There's so many, I can't keep up.

You're telling me, gramps. I have to start saving them in my phone with the name of the city they live in, because I can't remember their names. In the notes section of my phone, I have a list of about 50 cities with the girls in each along with their name/contact info.

I also realize that you're an elder, but I didn't want to ask you for advice, because you're a moron.

 

[Marshall Jeff]

She's ugly

 

[riflearm2]

She's ugly

Oh, the non contributor wants attention. Hi, Jeff. You look dumber than usual when you make those comments.

 

[Marshall Jeff]

Oh, the non contributor wants attention. Hi, Jeff. You look dumber than usual when you make those comments.

Drink another beer moron

 

[MichiganHerd]

Damn, I've seen those eyes before. She steal them from Sarah Huckabee Sanders?

 

[greengeezer]

She reminds me of a young Julia Stiles. Attractive.

 

[ThunderCat98]

I’m sure everyone here has seen Puss in Boots 2. Greengeezer is the moral cricket on Jack Horner’s (riflearms) shoulder.

 

[herdfan06]

She reminds me of a young Julia Stiles. Attractive.

 

[greengeezer]

That is the real problem in the world. Too many attractive women. Hard to choose.

 

[muthed]

That body and some fakies are enough for a couple of nights. She came to the hotel at 10:30 pm last night with no makeup, so she passed the test. From the first night, the mascara was the only heavy thing. She does the line off of the side of the eye for that punk rock/cat look.


You're telling me, gramps. I have to start saving them in my phone with the name of the city they live in, because I can't remember their names. In the notes section of my phone, I have a list of about 50 cities with the girls in each along with their name/contact info.

I also realize that you're an elder, but I didn't want to ask you for advice, because you're a moron.

You don't have much reading comp. do you? I wasn't offering advice, only stating the truth.

 

[riflearm2]

You don't have much reading comp. do you? I wasn't offering advice, only stating the truth.

Moron, nothing I said would have led a person of even average intelligence to think I claimed that you gave you advice. I was explaining why, even though you’re old as shit, that I didn’t ask for advice from you.

 

[riflearm2]

You don't have much reading comp. do you? I wasn't offering advice, only stating the truth.

Moron, nothing I said would have led a person of even average intelligence to think I claimed you gave you advice. I was explaining why, even though you’re old as shit, that I didn’t ask for advice.

 

[muthed]

Moron, nothing I said would have led a person of even average intelligence to think I claimed you gave you advice. I was explaining why, even though you’re old as shit, that I didn’t ask for advice.

Stutter much?

 

[i am herdman]

Is her right breast larger than the left?

She looks ok, but I would not jack to her. I think she has a lazy eye or something. One of my golf buddies has that deal going on. He can read a putt by standing sideways. When he drinks a few beers they straighten back up.

 

[greengeezer]

Is her right breast larger than the left?

She looks ok, but I would not jack to her. I think she has a lazy eye or something. One of my golf buddies has that deal going on. He can read a putt by standing sideways. When he drinks a few beers they straighten back up.

Do you inspect all women with a magnifying glass?

 

[i am herdman]

Do you inspect all women with a magnifying glass?

No, I actually have very open minded standards in regard to women and their looks. The older I get the more those standards open up or lower.

 

[herdfan06]

Is her right breast larger than the left?

She looks ok, but I would not jack to her. I think she has a lazy eye or something. One of my golf buddies has that deal going on. He can read a putt by standing sideways. When he drinks a few beers they straighten back up.

Something is a little bit off in that second photo.

 

[greengeezer]

Nice looking girl, but no way to judge her personality. The one worry I have is the photo of her taking the selfie. A girl who continually holds a cell phone in front of her face would be a relationship breaker for me.

 

[i am herdman]

Nice looking girl, but no way to judge her personality. The one worry I have is the photo of her taking the selfie. A girl who continually holds a cell phone in front of her face would be a relationship breaker for me.

They all do that now geezer. They all do that picture thing

 

[i am herdman]

Something is a little bit off in that second photo.

Look at her boobs in the first picture and then in the second picture. She must have a good support bra in the first picture or those things are bound up or something. Then here one boob looks way bigger. Her eyes have some things going on.

 

[greengeezer]

They all do that now geezer. They all do that picture thing

Yeah, I’ve noticed that. Maybe lifting a phone all the time makes one breast larger.

 

[herdfan06]

Look at her boobs in the first picture and then in the second picture. She must have a good support bra in the first picture or those things are bound up or something. Then here one boob looks way bigger. Her eyes have some things going on.

Her left is being concealed by that mini-human in the first picture.

 

[Archetype XLIV]

Not sure what more you can expect out of me.

A lot of bullshit, like you said.

 

[riflearm2]

A lot of bullshit, like you said.

We are discussing females in this thread. Please remove yourself, just like you removed your balls when you started your bimonthly Facebook admiration posts.

We both know that you aren’t allowed to look at and discuss females.

 

[Archetype XLIV]

Please remove yourself, just like you removed your balls when you started your bimonthly Facebook admiration posts.

Maybe you should start?

These women keep breaking up with you because you have the personality of a house plant.

 

[i am herdman]

Yeah, I’ve noticed that. Maybe lifting a phone all the time makes one breast larger.

Look at the second picture.

 

[riflearm2]

l

These women keep breaking up with you

Oh, another liar. So personality of a houseplant, average looking, and not wealthy. It’s amazing I even bag them to begin with. How does that happen? It just be the quality of weed that I sell them.

you have the personality of a house plant.

House plants are nice to look at, healthy to be around, not high maintenance, bring value in multiple ways, are quiet, and don’t bother anybody. Yeah, I guess I am like a house plant.

 

[riflearm2]

Look at her boobs in the first picture and then in the second picture. She must have a good support bra in the first picture or those things are bound up or something. Then here one boob looks way bigger. Her eyes have some things going on.

Moron, she has implants. Unless she were to gain a lot of weight or the doctor used different CCs, fakies tend to be more identical than regular chesticles. Her arm is clearly raised on one side pushing that sweater puppy together which makes it looks different than the other. And her eyes have absolutely nothing “going on.”

 

[greengeezer]

OK, Rifle. I believe you should make a play for this one. She is very attractive, and even though I can’t determine her demeanor or personality from a photo, I know you don’t suffer fools. I doubt she is morally or intellectually bankrupt.

What could you lose? Isn’t it better to take a chance and it not work out than to let her go and realize later she might have been the one?

When I was a student at Marshall, I dated a young coed for several years that was every bit as lovely as the girl in your photo. I made a terrible relationship decision that I regret to this day. Take the chance and good luck.

 

[i am herdman]

Moron, she has implants. Unless she were to gain a lot of weight or the doctor used different CCs, fakies tend to be more identical than regular chesticles. Her arm is clearly raised on one side pushing that sweater puppy together which makes it looks different than the other. And her eyes have absolutely nothing “going on.”